That first step of faith on our journey (TylerAnn)

Jeremy and I have been out shopping for purity rings for our kids. As we shop for each of our teens, I can't help but remember the day we gave Tyler Ann her ring. I can't believe how blessed I am with this young lady as my first child. God definitely knew what he was doing when he gave us her first.

It was sixteen years ago that this independent, kicking screaming baby joined our family. From the moment she was born she made it clear she would be a fighter. She was born with three holes in her heart, but she never let that limit her, and over time God healed each and every hole. Funny thing is as he healed those physical holes he also filled her spiritual holes.

She walked early, she talked early. She was an easy baby, slept a lot, and when awake was not too demanding. She watched and learned from her surroundings. She loved everyone who came into her life easily, without judgement. Before we knew it she was making friends every time we left the house, at the park, at the grocery, at church, anywhere we went. She had a heart for the weak and down hearted. She had a compassion for animals and humans alike. Often bring in critters from outside in her pockets. She was a determined child and still is.

As she became old enough to start school, it soon was obvious she had some weaknesses in learning to read. But that never stopped her, in fact, it just made her work harder. She now not only reads, but she teaches others to read too. Dyslexia was not her enemy, but a friend to motivate her to be all she can be.

At a very young age, she started to show an interest in the Bible, and understanding the things of God. She prayed and sought God even as a toddler and preschooler. By the time she was six she knew she wanted to be a part of God's family forever. Then a couple years later, she decided she wanted to make a public statement of faith and be baptised. I was worried she was too young, but the elders of our church did a great job of making sure she understood and was truly ready.

She amazed me as a big sister and friend. She was a a natural nurturer (so not like her mother), and an excellent listener even as a little girl. Often when new foster kids came into our home the first person they connected to was Tyler. They trusted her and confided in her. Even at the age of five, I remember her one time telling the gospel message to a girl at the park. She just loved telling everyone about Jesus, and still does.

When she was nine Tyler attended her cousins Quencinera. After that day she began preparing for hers. She couldn't wait till the day when she would be able to announce to the world and God that she was going to serve God in purity and truth all her life. She wanted everyone to know that to her there was no greater joy than serving God. She began serving him by getting involved in Child Evangelism Fellowship ministry and teaching Back Yard clubs and Good News Clubs. She went on missions trips to teach children about Jesus. And she never stopped reaching out to her family, friends, and even complete strangers with the truth of God's Word.

Finally, the day came for her big party. She looked beautiful in her dress, and she sang beautifully, but the thing that I will never forget is how she glowed with the love of the LORD that day. As she gave her speech stating how she wanted to remain pure before God, and to serve Him always, I thought my heart might exploded from so much pride. AS her dad gave her a ring to be a reminder of God's presence to help her keep her promise of purity, and his and our love for her, I couldn't help but have tears flow down my face.

Now a year later, she is still an amazing example of God's grace and love for us. She is becoming a woman who loves to be in God's Word, learning it, teaching it, obeying it, and sharing it. I pray she will always have a love for God and the things of God. I can honestly say that she is becoming one of my closest and dearest friends.

I am so thankful to God for his gift of Tyler Ann.
correction Tyler Ann is now almost seventeen, not sixteen.
 

Journeying with Jeremy

This week as I drove Jeremy to doctors appointments to learn about diabetic treatment and care, I was in awe of God again and his amazing way of caring for us, His children. Over the years Jeremy has always gone in for his annual physical and things were pretty steady. Sleep apnea, high blood pressure, and try and lose some weight. Year after, year this was the same. Even last year when he was under a great deal of stress, his physical health was good. So, when Jeremy started being moody, having a short temper, and being overly tired. I wondered if he was depressed. But, felt led to just pray for him, and let God answer those prayers. Of course, the results of those prayers were not what I was expecting.

When we were living in Pennsylvania last year are life was the busiest ever. Jeremy worked twelve hour days six to seven days a week. He was dedicated to his position and committed to doing it right. It was a challenge and he rose to the challenge. Even though he would come home exhausted, I could tell he loved the excitement of what he was doing. Towards, the end of our time there, he began having panic attacks, and went in to see the doctor. He had not been on any medication for about two years, but now his blood pressure was up again. But, all his other labs looked good, and he got back to work. Even though his job was stressful, and not being at home was stressful, he placed that stress in God's hands. He had learned to lean hard on God. Another thing that happened will in Pennsylvania was our family changed our eating habits. We decided to eat whole, fresh, natural foods. With this diet change we began being healthier. Then Jeremy made the decision to leave his current position and return to his former position back here, in Michigan.

The return was stressful on our whole family, as we left an amazing church, and an amazing season of relying on God. As we settled back in here, we picked up some of our old habits that we had left behind. I noticed Jeremy seemed depressed, angry at times, and short tempered. I thought maybe he was not happy being back, maybe the slower pace was too slow. He continued to assure me he was very glad to be back in the IT department. But, I could tell there was something wrong. I began praying, and asked Jeremy to go to the doctor. He didn't make time to go to the doctor, until his C pap machine (sleep apnea machine) started acting up. When he went in, his blood pressure was extremely high. The doctor ordered lab work, and told Jeremy to return in a couple weeks. Well, Jeremy didn't follow up with the labs. But then he began having chest pain. It scared him, and we went in to urgent care. It was just reflux, but he was told to follow up with his doctor. The beautiful thing was his follow up appointment was early in the morning. So early, that Jeremy didn't even eat before he went in. So, having a lab right in the office, they were able to do his lab work right then. Since he hadn't eaten the doctor decided to add a test for diabetes. Praise the Lord, because even though less than a year ago his physical showed his sugar in a normal range, his numbers that morning after fasting all night were over 400. As soon as we heard this we both realized that Jeremy had been having symptoms of diabetes for a couple months. Great hunger and unquenchable thirst, frequent need to urinate, mood swings, trouble sleeping and concentrating. Now, no one ever wants to hear that they have a disease and it will need to be treated and monitored the rest of their life, but there is a great relief in knowing what is wrong with your body when you don't feel yourself.

Another amazing factor in all this is God's timing. If Jeremy had developed to this point in his health when we were in Pennsylvania, he would not have been able to continue to work at the pace he was working. Here, he can take the time to get the medical care he needs and prevent further health risks, like heart failure or stroke. Also, the fact that we had already made some healthy eating habit changes, Jeremy doesn't have to be overwhelmed by a new diet and taking medication and charting his blood sugar. Our current diet is exactly what he needs to be doing to help aid in healthy sugar levels. God knew what Jeremy could handle, and He in his graciousness prepared him for this time of getting healthy.

So, Jeremy has a way to go but,God is gently taking him by the hand and leading him on a road to better physical health.

The cool thing is as Jeremy journeys into a better physical healthy place, God takes Him and I into a better spiritually healthy place to. As I trust God to care for Jeremy (without me nagging), I grow in my faith. As Jeremy listens to God and obeys him, he grows in His relationship with God. And as Jeremy obeys God, we all as a family are blessed as we are witnesses of God's work in his life. I am always so grateful to know God's ways are so much better than mine. Praise the LORD!

God's Story in my son Daniel's Life

This month, as I have been driving my three oldest back and forth to driver's education classes, I couldn't help but marvel at the work God has done in my oldest son's life. I remember so clearly the day he came home to us, I remember the days he left and then returned again. I remember the look in the psychologists eyes when he gave us what he believed was Daniel's future prognosis. I also remember the day the truth of Christ became real to him, and he made him Lord of his life. Each day, week, month, and year that has passed with him has been a miracle and a gift that God has given me to be a part of it.

That day no so long ago that Daniel came to us, as a frightened three year old, changed my life forever. He was dirty and scared. I remember bringing him into the house, and like every good foster mom, immediately giving him a bath and checking him for lice. As I spoke gently to this timid little boy, whom I was told spoke only Spanish, I could see the fear in his eyes. I spoke to him in my broken Spanish, and hoped it offered him comfort. As soon as the bath was over, I of course, offered him something to eat. He did not trust me, but fear of what might happen if he didn't eat made him pick up the snack and eat. After finishing the snack he placed himself in the corner of our small living room. He remained there the rest of the day, until we placed him in bed. The next day he spent the day again in that corner, day after day he stayed there. As he stood in that corner, he watched as we interacted around him. The children, TylerAnn (3), and Rachel (1), Adam (a special needs foster child who had been in our family for a couple years), and Lydia (Daniel's baby sister)played around him and even stopped to talk to him and try and included him. I cleaned and cared for the home and children, and would stop and talk and smile to him. I knew from being around foster children all my life, it was better to give him his time and space. Eventually, hoping he would start to feel safe and trusting. Finally after weeks, he started to interact with the girls and come out of the corner a little at a time. Once in a while, a light would show in his eyes and every so often something would make him smile and you would see the cutest dimple in his cheek. But then everything changed.

A strange thing happened the day we took Daniel and Lydia into our family. It was always our goal as foster parents to help parents and children reunite. We wanted to build up families. So we never planned to adopt the foster children we took into our homes. But, the day we took Daniel and Lydia into our home was different. When I got the call to take them in something deep inside me said, “make a life-time commitment to these two.” This was really weird and even more strange was I felt like accepting the placement even though I couldn't get a hold of Jeremy to ask him. Jeremy finally arrived home from work that evening, and the first words out of his mouth were, “where are the kids?” I looked at him with a look that said, “how did you know?” He said, “God told me we would get some kids today, and that we are to make a lifetime commitment to them.” As you can imagine, I was floored. To this day, I praise God for giving us such a clear word, because what happened next could have been so different for their future if God hadn't given us that word.

The court decided Daniel and Lydia should be moved to a fluent Spanish speaking home. Both their parents spoke Spanish as their primary language, and it was assumed that Daniel also spoke Spanish. Normally, in a situation like this we would send the children on with our love and prayers, and move on to the next children that God sent our way. But, for some strange reason, I felt I needed to tell the caseworker that when they needed to come back to us we would be ready for them. We got lots of calls for other children, but God said to hold the spot. After a couple months we receive a call, Daniel and Lydia need to be moved. This foster home abused and neglected them and the damage was evident. Daniel returns to his corner in the living room. We start all over.

Slowly, he begins to trust again. He begins to play with Tyler and Rachel again. Often, though when I am not looking the children near him are getting hurt, mysteriously. There isn't just fear in him now, there is anger too. He doesn't talk still, and it is clear he doesn't know Spanish or English at all. When people do speak to him in Spanish he becomes anxious and upset. We decided to not use Spanish at all, and ask all our friends and family to not speak to him in Spanish. Of course, as he goes for regular visits with his parents and relatives each week, he has a great deal of anxiety, and after each visit day, is a day of standing in the corner.

Then we get another call from the case worker. An aunt and uncle have requested to take the children in. So, Daniel and Lydia will be moved again the next day. I agree to take them to the aunt. I tell the aunt that if she needs any help with them at all she can call. I tell the caseworker when they need a home for them to call. A couple months pass, and I give birth to a baby boy, Brenden. Then the call comes, the aunt can't care for them any longer. Their needs are just too much for her to handle. My heart breaks for this aunt, because I can see she really wanted to care for these precious ones, and felt like a failure. But, she had three little ones of her own and they lived in a small apartment in a bad neighborhood. So, she was stuck inside with them all day, everyday. Lydia crying all day and all night, and Daniel standing in the corner scared. It was more than she could do. So, the Daniel and Lydia return to us again.

Visits with mom and dad continue often as well as visits with other extended family. These cause Daniel great anxiety and fear. Daniel's step dad (Lydia’s father) was very abusive man. He had been beating Daniel and his mom for all of Daniel's life. When Lydia was born he began beating her the very first day she was home from the hospital. But, when he would go to far with the abuse and the doctor was needed, Daniel was blamed for the broken bones that Lydia had. Daniel was told by these parents to tell the doctors and nurses that he hurt the baby. So, even though Daniel couldn't talk he did understand that according to his parents he was a “bad” boy that hurt babies. Yet, at the same time, these same parents told him at the end of each visit that he was responsible for his sister and to take care of her. He was very confused.

The parents make an astounding confession of all the abuse done to both Daniel and Lydia. This confession is done in an attempt to show the judge that they were sorry. But, instead of showing regret the dad made statements that made it clear that he believed it was his right and duty as a father to beat his wife and children. The judge finally makes the decision to terminate the parents rights. Daniel and Lydia are made wards of the state of Michigan. Daniel is now five years old. He still doesn't really talk much. He still spends lots of time in the corner. He still shows anger, distrust, fear, and anxiety. We take him to a therapist. After the first couple of sessions with Daniel, the therapist tells us that Daniel suffers from Post traumatic stress syndrome, reactive attachment disorder, and neurological damage. She suggests we go to a genetics doctor and have an MRI done. The look in that therapists eyes will always be forever in my mind. It was a look that said, you have a hopeless situation . We decide that to put Daniel through such tests and appointments would be terrifying to him. Hospitals scared him, due to the fact that that is where Lydia was always taken and that is where he was taken from his family and put into care. So, instead of taking the therapists advice we decided to trust God and just give Daniel all the love and security we could.

Unfortunately another aunt and uncle come into the picture, and want be considered for adoption. Daniel and Lydia have never met these relatives, but visits are started and they start seeing these strangers. The aunt requests to meet me, and writes me a long letter with lots of questions about the children. I hesitate to meet her, by this point my heart couldn't take anymore pain or loss for these kids. I ask my mom to go and meet the aunt for me, and to take a letter I wrote to her. In this letter, I encourage the aunt if she is seriously interested in giving Daniel and Lydia a good home to go online and research, post traumatic stress syndrome, shaken baby syndrome (Lydia), and reactive attachment disorder. I am not really sure what changed in the aunts mind, but after that visit they never saw the children or asked about them again. So, finally after three years we adopt Daniel and Lydia.

Daniel is six years old, and he is talking but not nearly at the level of the typical six year old. He teaches himself how to ride a bike in the backyard. He continues to hurt the other children, especially when no one is looking. We begin school work. It is clear that there is some kind of learning problem. But, we press on.

Daniel begins to trust us, the light returns to his eyes, the dimple comes out more and more. But, there are some serious communication problems, and development problems. But, we decided to just keep working with him and bonding with him. Finally, when he is twelve years old, we decided to have him see a psychologist and get the tests that were recommended when he was little. When we meet with the psychologist for the results of the tests, we are very nervous. We wonder if Daniel is going to be able to learn right and wrong, we wonder if Daniel is going to be able to be independent someday. We wonder if he is truly bonded and connected to us. So, we are so excited at the first words from the doctor, “Daniel is not depressed and he is bonded to his family.” We are thrilled. But, then the rest of the diagnosis comes. “Daniel has a genetic languages based learning disorder with additional neurological damage and autistic tendencies,” says the doctor. The doctor goes on to explain to us that the half of the brain that process communication of any kind is dull in Daniel and doesn't work. He goes on to say that this is probably common in his biological family, but that Daniels case is extreme (I realize that this is probably true of his biological mom too). In addition to this he has serious neurological damage probably due to neglect in the early years of life. Lastly, he let's us know that he doesn't want to label him with autism, but there are definitely signs of it. We are not sure what to make of all this. We are definitely impressed with the thoroughness of the testing, because they asked us very few questions but did get the results from working with Daniel that we knew were accurate. The positive information he gives us is that most people with Daniel disorder don't talk or read at all. The doctor actually asked us how we worked with Daniel, since he did talk and read. We of course knew it was a God thing. The doctor explained that Daniel probably only takes in 10% of what he hears, reads, and sees. This explained a lot. We now realized Daniel wasn't being defiant but truly did not understand what we were asking of him at times. We asked the doctor our big question,”Do you think Daniel can live independently someday?” I love the answer the doctor gave. He said he truly didn't know because Daniel had already exceeded the expectations given to someone with his diagnosis. He then encouraged me to continue to develop his communication skills, he said it would truly be a miracle if he could work up to a junior high level of reading and communication. The doctor suggested testing Daniel every couple of years to see how he is doing.

Well, it wasn't long after that first evaluation that it became evident that yes, Daniel is autistic. He has asperger's. If you have ever talked to Daniel for more than a minute, you can probably tell what his obsession is. Yep, Christian Rock Music. But, it hasn't always been Christian rock music. When he was in middle school he went through a short phase of being obsessed with the Presidents. But, then he became completely obsessed with sex and porn, and we were scared of what this meant for him and our families future. When we talked with the doctors and experts they said that once someone with asperger's has an obsession there is nothing you can do about it. I just didn't think that was true, and I remember him being obsessed with the presidents. I prayed about it and decided to get him help to deal with his confusion about sex (it was obvious he had been sexually abused, and that someone had mislead him). I also decided to help him find a healthy interest. So, I started buying him different things. Cars, models, tools, puzzles, music, games, dinosaurs, etc. Then one day it became clear he liked music. So, we started encouraging that interest. At the same time, we helped him work through his confusion about sex. We talked openly about it, and he admitted he didn't like how it controlled him, and it scared him. To help him feel safe, we put an alarm on his bedroom door at night, we locked him out of the computer, and we never let him go anywhere without his mom or dad. We did this for two years (it was difficult, but so worth the effort). During this time, he also went to therapy with a wonderful counselor. Over time his obsession did change completely to Christian Rock music. But, it wasn't til after he accepted Jesus as his personal savior that God helped release him from the bondage of sexual sin. That day will forever be in my mind too.

It was Good Friday, and I asked each of my children one on one to tell me what Good Friday meant to them. Daniel slowly explained in his unique way of conversing that Jesus died for his sins and then rose again to prove he was God. He told the complete story to me, I looked at him and asked him, “Do you believe that?” He said,”Yes.” So I asked him why he never asked Jesus to forgive his sins and be his savior. He didn't know. I said do you want to do that right now. He said yes, and we prayed right there. I have never had an experience like that before or since. But right as we prayed something heavy was lifted from that room and from Daniel. He and I both felt it. From that day forward, Daniel is truly a changed person.

He still struggles to connect and communicate with others. But, he is truly a miracle of God's Work. He is seventeen now, and last week he took his drives education exam and got the second highest score in his class (sister Rachel had the highest, and TylerAnn came in third after Daniel). I don't know what the future holds for him, but I am excited to see what God does. If you ever talk to Daniel I promise he will give you one of his bright eyed, dimpled grins that will make your week. God is good!

Links to learn more:

http://www.autism.org.uk/about-autism/autism-and-asperger-syndrome-an-introduction/what-is-asperger-syndrome/what-is-asperger-syndrome-easy-read.aspx

http://www.myaspergerschild.com/2008/09/aspergers-obsessions.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Language-based_learning_disability

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reactive_attachment_disorder

http://kidshealth.org/parent/positive/talk/ptsd.html

http://www.adaa.org/living-with-anxiety/children

Daniel 10:12

Then he continued, "Do not be afraid, Daniel. Since the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to them." (NIV)

Weekly assignment sheet

Ok, so I had plans to write this really great blog today. But, since I did not get that done, I will share with you what I did get done.  In an effort to help my children that can't remember their weekly assignments even when I have them write them down, I put together a sheet for the next school week for them.  I thought I would share it here.  People ask me about our day, and our school studies, and it is hard to explain.  So, this may help a little.  This brief outline does not included a lot of the little kids activities, but it gives a list of the focus points for the week.  Please feel free to post questions and share it with others.  I will try and post a follow up, after the week is over of how it went with this little asignment sheet.

Week 3, October 22, 2012

Bible reading:

Monday  
Duet. 9-12
Tues.
Book of Joel
Wed.
Psalms 23-33
Thurs.
Matt 8-10
Fri.
1 Peter 1-3

read orally to elementary student at breakfast, upper grade students read on own and journal

Historical Focus and Biblical teaching:

Deuteronomy Study with Beth Moore ls. One Law of Love

(read ls. One article on pg. 6-11)
Wednesday evening as a family

dig in deep into Duet. during your independent Bible time.

(create maps and charts using internet, concordance, etc.)
independent work

Memory Focus:

Introduce Deuteronomy 6:1-9 during morning worship

(copy it in full into your binder and draw a picture or write a journal about it)
(Elem. Students copy verse 1 only and draw a picture)

Copy Work Focus:

Psalms 14-22

(take your time, do your best to get it in, but do not push too fast that you make mistakes)
copy time is from 9-10 am and 11 to noon, elementary students work with mom during this time

Focus on punctuation and capitalization. Remember it is poetry and therefore, doesn't always follow the regular punctuation and capitalization rules. Take time to read it out loud to yourself, and try and make it flow like poetry. Maybe read it to each other, pointing out to one another how to make it sound like poetry.

Independent work

Science Focus:

Creation

read lesson four of Zoology book 1: Flying creatures of the fifth day.
Independent work
Watch Moody Classics: Dust or Destiny
together in evening
(make notes in binder)

Missionary Focus:

Kisses from Katie read chapter 8

together at dinner
(do research on Uganda, map it, find out about it's population, look for recent articles about it in the news.)
Independent work

Math Focus:

Rounding, Basic Number Properties, and Number Baes intro.

Taught by Rachel afternoon Wed., Thurs., and Fri.

Music study:

HSMA Monday nights

private lessons Tues afternoon
practice time in afternoon daily

Additional Studies:

Hebrew: daily mom and Tyler 1 pm

Bible w/ dad study of Isaiah 53 Tues and Thurs. evenings

family Work out (P.E.) Tues and Thur evenings with Rachel

Independent work outs as assigned by Rachel

Good News Club prep and practice prep on Monday, practice on Tues,. Do on Weds afternoons

Jehovah Jirah (God my provider)

Today I heard this story of Elijah and how God was his provider.

 Now Elijah the Tishbite, of Tishbe in Gilead, said to Ahab, “As the LORD, the God of Israel, lives, before whom I stand, there shall be neither dew nor rain these years, except by my word.” And the word of the LORD came to him: “Depart from here and turn eastward and hide yourself by the brook Cherith, which is east of the Jordan. You shall drink from the brook, and I have commanded the ravens to feed you there.” So he went and did according to the word of the LORD. He went and lived by the brook Cherith that is east of the Jordan. And the ravens brought him bread and meat in the morning, and bread and meat in the evening, and he drank from the brook. And after a while the brook dried up, because there was no rain in the land.
 Then the word of the LORD came to him, “Arise, go to Zarephath, which belongs to Sidon, and dwell there. Behold, I have commanded a widow there to feed you.” So he arose and went to Zarephath. And when he came to the gate of the city, behold, a widow was there gathering sticks. And he called to her and said, “Bring me a little water in a vessel, that I may drink.” And as she was going to bring it, he called to her and said, “Bring me a morsel of bread in your hand.” And she said, “As the LORD your God lives, I have nothing baked, only a handful of flour in a jar and a little oil in a jug. And now I am gathering a couple of sticks that I may go in and prepare it for myself and my son, that we may eat it and die.” And Elijah said to her, “Do not fear; go and do as you have said. But first make me a little cake of it and bring it to me, and afterward make something for yourself and your son. For thus says the LORD, the God of Israel, ‘The jar of flour shall not be spent, and the jug of oil shall not be empty, until the day that the LORD sends rain upon the earth.’” And she went and did as Elijah said. And she and he and her household ate for many days. The jar of flour was not spent, neither did the jug of oil become empty, according to the word of the LORD that he spoke by Elijah.

(1 Kings 17:1-16 ESV)

I have heard this story many times and it is one of my favorites.  I was always amazed at how God provided daily oil and flour for Elijah, the widow, and her son for over three years.  But, today, I really focused on the fact that God provided for Elijah one day at a time.  This is a lesson the Lord has really been trying to teach me.  Last school year our family verse was:

Matthew 6:33
But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

This verse follows a list of things that we as humans tend to worry about.  Things like where we live, what we will eat, and what we will wear.  As a rule, I am not a worrier, but this past year moving to PA and then back to MI there were many times that I was distressed and struggled to place my trust  in the Lord.  Of course, the Lord was ever faithful to me.  If you have read my previous posts about our move to Pa and our time there you know God has been good to us, even when I didn't place my complete trust in Him.
Well, as we returned to MI this time, I wanted to not worry and to trust God to provide us a home.  So, I decided to only look at one day at a time.  To really trust Him for that day, and any future days he had for me.  I wasn't really sure how that should look.  I mean, I knew I wasn't going to find a new home unless I looked for one.  But, I also didn't want to push my own plans in finding a home.  So, we started getting the word out that we were looking for a place, and we started looking here and there and everywhere.  Doors started opening for us.  We looked at a handful of houses and none of them were quite a match, but as time went on we wondered if we would find a place that would be a good match.  Last week we looked at several houses, and each of them was a home we could make work.  But this one was a little small, and that one was a little pricey, and this one was a little far to drive, and so on.  But, we decided maybe we are going to have to settle for something.  We had four houses in the works and none of them was exactly what we wanted, but all of them would have worked. 
So, Friday I was waiting for call backs on them all, and I was praying and thinking and wondering which house it would be.  I just didn't feel like any of them was the right one because I had this feeling that we were going to rent from someone who needed a renter just as much as we need to rent (a similar situation to that which we found ourselves in in PA).  I also kept having this feeling that our rent was going to be lower than we budgeted for.  So, as I am praying and thinking I get an email from Jeremy.  He just happened to check to see if there was any new listings on Craigslist (there had not been anything new in days).  It was about noon, and there was a new posting at 11 of a house in Dansville  (perfectly located for us).  It looked perfect and the price a lot lower than we had seen for anything we looked at.  I called and immediately I knew that this was the one, and I could tell that the woman on the phone felt it too.  I got of the phone and called Jeremy and before the day was over we both knew, and the owners also knew that we had been blessed by God to find each other.  The owners needed to rent their home out right away, the last tenants had moved out and they needed to cover their expenses.  We of course, needed a place right away.  By Saturday morning we signed a contracted and got keys.  I have been laughing and giddy all day (if you know me I am not a laughy, giggle person).  But, I am just so amazed at God  and His timing. 
He has everything planned for us, and if we can trust him one day at a time He will give us the peace and joy that only comes from Him.  Today, God not only provided a home for us to live in here, but he also provided a great family ministry for us.  The kids and I are going to be doing Good News Club once a week as an after school program.  We are so excited to see God provided for us, and also for CEF and the children we will serve.
So, we are back Michigan and so excited to see what Jehovah-Jirah has for each day ahead.

Journey On

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you. Joshua 1:9

When the Israelites had been freed from their bondage in Egypt, and after wandering in the desert for forty years, it was time for God to take them into a new promised land. But, in those forty years of wandering in the dessert, the elders all died and the young who had lived their whole lives in the dessert were the ones left to go on this journey into the promised land. Moses spoke to Joshua, their new leader, and gave him all the instructions from the Lord for his chosen people. Because you see Moses couldn't go into the land with them. No, only the new generation would enter this new land. I can only imagine that these young men and woman must have had some uneasiness about what was ahead for them. They must have wondered how life would be once they stepped out in their journey to possess the promised land. I am sure they thought it was a wonderful blessing to be led by God, but I am also sure many had doubts and fears.

But God told them to be strong, courageous, and not discouraged or afraid because he would be with them wherever they went. As I reread this story, I was encouraged in my journey. This past year the Lord went with us to Pennsylvania and he remained their with us. Then after Jeremy resigned his position and we waited to see what the Lord had for us next, I wondered many things. Would he take us back to Decatur, IN to be near Jeremy's family? Would he move us to a whole new place to be apart of new opportunities? Would he take us back to Michigan, and would it be in the same area? Or would there be an opportunity for us to remain in Lancaster, PA? As we prayed, planned, and waited to see what was ahead. I became anxious and unsure. I became angry and discouraged. I became overwhelmed by it all. Then finally we had an answer. Jeremy would have his old job back in Jackson, MI. Jeremy said he was glad to go back, Jeremy seemed relieved and even excited. I wanted to be happy, I wanted to be encouraging, I wanted to be submissive and supportive. But I WASN'T. I was mad, I was disappointed, I was selfish. Why? Because the whole time we were in Lancaster, even though life was very hard, I felt like we as a family had a vision and goal. The weeks were long and hard, often I was home with the kids Monday through Saturday with no other people ever visiting or connecting with us. But, we grew during these times, and Sunday's would dawn with great encouragement from the church people. Everyone at the church that I would come into contact with each week, in some way or another encouraged me. Even the children and the worship team singers would encourage me each week. So, why was I mad? I felt like everything I had been going through this last year was over. All the work the kids and I had done would be for nothing. I felt like the support I had from the church was being ripped away from me, just when we as a family were really starting to connect. I felt scared.

Why scared? Scared that if we would go back to Michigan, I would just fall back into our old habits. Could we take what we had learned from our time in Lancaster and apply it to our lives in Michigan? Would we be able to find a place to rent again? Would we just go back to the same life we were living before we left Michigan? I like this new confident husband. I like the leader he had become. I like the lifestyle in Lancaster. I liked that more people in our community lived a simple, conservative life. I liked not feeling like an odd ball.

Those Israelites must have felt like real odd balls, as they walked around the walls of Jericho. They must have wanted to trust God with all their hearts and want to step out in faith. And they did. They did as their leader, Joshua instructed them. They had to trust Joshua, and the way they did that was by trusting that their God to speak to Joshua. So, like those Israelites. I found myself in a place where I had to trust my husband, even when I wasn't sure, even when my feelings said differently. I found the only way I too could place my trust in my husband, my leader, was to place my full trust in God.

So, like the Israelites, who returned to their forefathers promised land, I know have returned to my homeland (so to speak). The Israelites where completely changed from their time in Egypt and the dessert. I too am completely changed from my time away.

So, even though I don't feel excited and overjoyed about my return. I do know that the Lord is in control and he leads us forward. I am not sure where exactly he has for us to call home yet. But, I know he will show Jeremy the best place for our family to continue to grow and serve the Lord with all our hearts, soul, and strength.

Today, as we look at a rental home in a new town. I trust God will make it clear if there is a place for us to serve and minister and grow here. I trust even if we make the wrong choice, God will do what he always does for those he loves. He will bring glory to himself and good to our lives. So, we journey on.

Romans 8:28

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

footnote:  you can read this story in the Bible the book of Joshua.

A year of Growth

Many of our friends and family have been praying for us and I thought today would be a good day to share how your prayers are being answered. To some of our close friends and family the information in this blog will be a surprise (no it is not a baby or an adoption).

A year ago this month our family made the move from Lansing, Michigan to beautiful Lancaster, Pennsylvania. This was not a move that came out of the blue. No, for a couple years God had been working on our family preparing us for a change. We knew he was getting us ready for a big change, and we waited and anticipated it. An opportunity came for Jeremy to apply for a leadership position in the company he worked for, Alro Steel. He figured even if he didn't get the position that it would give him an opportunity to hear from those above him what he needed to do to prepare for such a role in the company. It was a long shot for him to get such a position. But, God had other plans and Jer was offered the job. We saw God clearly directing our path to move to Pennsylvania. So, we moved out in faith. God made an awesome thing happen in providing us with a home and a wonderful church family all in the same week. Jeremy had come to Pennsylvania to start his job and to find us a home. Each Sunday he would attend a different church to see if he could find a church family for us. Week after week he didn’t find us a home or a church. Then one Sunday he felt called to look across the river (he had been looking in York, where he works). So, he found a church online and liked the preaching he heard (a message by Pastor Jerry), and decided to try it out. He felt a peace right away and called me afterward to tell me he thought he found a church family. The very next day, he received a call from the pastor and they talked about our housing need. The pastor knew of an elder who need to rent out his home, and asked if he could give Jeremy's number to him, in a matter of minutes the elder called and made plans for looking at the house and the next thing you know we are moving in.

What a beautiful story right. Well, here is where the story takes a turn. Jeremy resigned from his position and has asked to be given an opportunity to stay with the company in a different role. For those of you who didn't know this, sorry for the shock. What does this mean? Well, this year has been the most difficult, amazing, challenging, awesome, maturing, bonding, maddening, joyous, frustrating, and miraculous in our nineteen years of marriage. So, I'll start at the beginning. When Jeremy decided to apply for the position of plant superintendent. We both new that it would be a major commitment, especially at first. We knew that this being a new plant it would take time, energy, and God for Jeremy to come in and bring in the Alro company mentality. He knew he would have to do a lot of traing, and give a ton of training to others. He knew he would need to be gone often. I knew it too. But, we prayed and sought God and felt it would be worth it. One reason being that Jer knew once he got his plant running the Alro way it would allow him a little more flexibility in the long run. So we made a one year commitment of him giving his full time and attention to the company. This was huge, because Jeremy's always been a keep work at work and home at home kind of guy. But, I was excited for him and he was excited to see how God would use him and grow him in this situation.

So, we went into it committed together. Thank God he gave us the wisdom to make that plan or I am not sure our marriage would have survived it. When the kids and I arrived in PA. I was suffering from baby blues (I had just given birth to baby Anna), and all the moving prep had put my back out again. So, I was feeling pretty poorly. To make matters worse the kids (who are very friendly and outgoing) couldn't find any friends or neighbors to connect with. We were all quickly becoming discouraged, but wanting to be an encouragement to Jeremy when he was able to be home. The problem was we never knew when he would be home.

He was working at least twelve hours a day six days a week. Sometimes working days and sometimes working nights. He was working to get the shop in order and to train others, and to learn his role. He was leaning hard on the Lord and learning to trust in Him in ways he never had to in the past. Jer has been blessed with the ability to learn quickly and to apply what he has learned effectively. Often in past jobs he has excelled with little effort. This was not the case in this new position. He love the challenge, he loved the need to depend on God, he loved growing and maturing in new areas. It was a whole new season of life, he had never experienced before. But, even though he loved it, he hated the sacrifice of his time with his family. He knew his first calling was to raise kids for God's kingdom. He didn't like that he never saw them, or me. But, he pressed on.

At the same time, the kids and I started a new school year in a state with home school laws. This was overwhelming to me. So, instead of first seeking the Lord and his plan (and not wanting to bother Jer) I made my own plans. This plan was lots of school curriculum and books that we hadn't used in the past. This plan was a complete failure. So, as the fall term started coming to an end I started praying and seeking Godly counsel from Jer and others. God called me back to the basics.

In all these trying times one amazing thing was going on. God was everywhere. The kids were seeking God on their own. The church (New Song Fellowship) was so full of great teaching and Godly wisdom from the pulpit, classes, children's programs, teen programs, small group, and evangelists (Jimmy DeYoung played a huge role in our decision to go back to the Bible basics), and retreats (both marriage and youth). In the absence of my home school peers from Michigan, I began seeking new peers. An unexpected thing happened in that I found those new peers online, not here in PA. These peers became huge influences in our families life. God was surrounding us and he was taking us on a journey that leads straight to him.

About six months into this new job, Jeremy starts praying and reading his Bible like he never has before. It is a change that holds him steady through the rough days at work. As he seeks God's will for him in his whole life, work, community, family, church, etc. He continues to hear the same message over and over. It is time for you to lead your family. You need to be a good manager of your home. You need to learn from this job situation that without good leadership there is no true success. True success is being completely in the will of the Lord. Even though he hears this message he isn't sure how God wants him to apply it. So, he continues to seek the Lord, work the long hours, and try and manage his home too.

I am amazed at him. I am so proud of all the hard work he is putting in and the desire he has to make sure he stays connected to me. We talk, we pray, we struggle, we press on.

We fall in love with New Song Fellowship, we start to love Lancaster and see ourselves and the kids staying long term. The kids start making friends and finding ministries to serve in. We begin making plans to get more involved.

Then Jeremy starts coming home exhausted and defeated. He starts realizing he can't on his own bring the Alro way to this plant, and he isn't sure he knows what to do to be an encouragement to his boss, his co-workers, and his employees. But, he get's excited to head off to a leadership training. He had continued to seek the Lord for direction, and had been spending extra time specifically asking God to show him what to do about his job situation. When he arrived at the leadership training he instantly began to be encouraged. He was reminded that he worked for a good company, and that they wanted to have their employees be successful. One of the speakers continued to say that it was alro's desire that their employees succeed and especially those in leadership. He went on to say that a true leader recognized the season of life he is in and adjusted to it. Furthermore, he said that alro didn't want their leaders to stay in a position that wasn't working for that season of life they were in. That they wanted to hear from their employees and help them succeed. Jer heard those words and a peace came over him. He went from that training and began praying fervently that God would give him the words to say and let the company know he needed to step down from his position. He called me on his drive home, and I began praying with him. After he got him, we prayed together. There was a peace that we knew was from God. Jer would let them know he wanted to step down, but stay with the company. We knew that in this decision he could be let go and/or we would have to move again. We knew that he could not stay in this plant if they accepted his resignation. Jer gave his notice that very week, serving his superiors a letter of intent. The Lord went before him, and the letter was accepted and the men spoke words of praise over him. They asked that he continue in his current position and not tell others what was going on while they sought his replacement and an opportunity for him in the company. This was on May 20^th. Since that time we have had many trials as we wait for the company to make the next move.

Jeremy's job continues to demand a great deal from him, and this past month his grandmother (in Indiana) suffered a serious stroke that ended in taking her home to the Lord after a month of struggle. These along with other family life struggles continue to press on us, but we continue to place our trust in the Lord.

During this year God has been ever faithfully drawing us to himself, and growing us together as husband and wife, and as a family. Today, we were given the news that in two weeks they will be presenting Jeremy with an opportunity. And now to the reason for this lengthy blog. We need your prayers to continue.

Here are our requests:

Pray with us that:

Jeremy can continue to work in his continued position for as long as God needs him to, and that he will work to bring God alone glory.

When Alro makes their offer Jer will know without a doubt if he should take it.

If it is time for Jeremy to walk away from Alro, that there will be a clear direction that we should go in, and that God's peace would abound.

When it does come time to move (we know that no matter what this time in PA is over, it the one thing we both agree on) that it we will know where, that we will find housing, and that the kids will be able to make a smooth transition.

Praise God with us:

That he gave us this year, it has been so exciting and wonderful to see God in the lives of the people here. This area is so rich with God's presence and we are so glad to have experienced it.

Perseverance really does bring growth.

   

These verses have been our strength this year. We hope they will encourage you too.

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.” – Hebrews 11:1 (NIV)

“(1)Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, (2)through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. (3)Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; (4)perseverance, character; and character, hope. (5)And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.” – Romans 5:1-5 (NIV)

(22)Then Jesus said to his disciples: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. (23)Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. (24)Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! (25)Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? (26)Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?

(27)“Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. (28)If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! (29)And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. (30)For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. (31)But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well. – Luke 12:22-31 (NIV)

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)